"No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens."
- Abraham Lincoln
"Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the lash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat."
- Mark Twain
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."
- Hippolyte Taine
Everything I know I learned from my cat: When you're hungry, eat. When you're tired, nap in a sunbeam. When you go to the vet's, pee on your owner.
- Gary Smith
"Fans think they want to see more than the 10 to 20 seconds of Itchy and Scratchy that we put on the show, but my feeling is less is more. Once you've skinned and flayed a cat, ripped his head off, made him drink acid and tied his tongue to the moon, there really isn't that much to say."
- Matt Groening
"God is really only another artist. He invented the giraffe, the elephant and the cat. He has no real style, He just goes on trying other things."
- Pablo Picasso
"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals."
- Winston Churchill
"When I play with my cat, how do I know that she is not passing time with me rather than I with her?"
"You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat."
- Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio
"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose."
- Garrison Keillor
"A meow massages the heart."
- Stuart McMillan
"Cats are the ultimate narcissists. You can tell this by all the time they spend on personal grooming. Dogs aren't like this. A dog's idea of personal grooming is to roll in a dead fish."
- James Gorman